Creepy Neighbor

Okay so my neighbor is creepy. Like, really creepy.

So my neighbor lives across the street from me. He is sober from alcohol and drugs (which doesn’t make him a bad person, just some info). He’s not threatening in the least bit; Just from his addictions he’s lost it a little bit, which is sad.

Okay so he doesn’t do this anymore really, but back in the day he would just be in his underwear in the front yard playing the air guitar. Like while you take out the trash, oh there’s creepy neighbor playing the air guitar again with only underwear on!

And he loves to stare as well. When I was 16 it was creepy to me for a grown man to creak open his door and watch you. When I go out to the car he either creaks the door or looks through the windows.

So here is the whole situation that has created the name, “Creepy Neighbor.”

When I was 16-18? my mom, sister and I were going to Florida to visit family. So it’s hella early in the morning, we are all tired and delusional. My sister and I are packing up the car at like 5, so it’s super dark out. We walk to go inside to get more luggage. Something in me told me to turn around and look at his house.

And what I saw was something I will never forget. I saw his door wide open, lights on, and his dick. I SAW HIS DICK. HE WAS IN THE FULL NUDE. WHY. WHY IS THAT ACCEPTABLE TO YOU TO STARE AT PEOPLE WHILE YOU’RE NAKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN AND LIGHTS ON.

So, because I’m an asshole, I tell my sister to turn around. She turns around and the look on her face was priceless. I can’t be the only one with that memory forever.

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